What is your life for?

{Music. Neon Hitch – Gucci Gucci}       

{Pictures – street artist Banksy}

When I was a child, I wanted to be many things. Now I realise those dreams were greatly influenced by television and people around me. I wanted to become a lawyer for I saw many movies with amazing and confident lawyers. I wanted to become assassin because it seemed like a such a free lifestyle with adventure as demonstrated by Mr. & Mrs. Smith.  I wanted to be an archeologist when I saw the Mummy. Wanted to be an explorer and a smart person when I admired Indiana Jones.

I was influenced, just like everyone around me. It is debatable now is it a good or a bad thing, but for me not one dream stayed. Since I started meditating, it is like all illusions I had started to fall apart. It caused for some greatly confused moments where I felt as lost as Lassie on its way home.

In high school we were asked what we would like to be. What would we want to study? I thought I had some idea at the beginning, maybe art school or movie school, but as time passed, such thoughts lessened for I couldn’t see myself in not one role for certain. I couldn’t say anymore – I wanted to be a movie director. Because, I realised I wasn’t made to be stuck in one role in life. I didn’t want that. Life doesn’t work that way. It is much too unpredictable to make plans and follow the protocol of the system and have it all go by the rules.


And the system? The system is terrible! Just look at it objectively. A child before school will not stop asking you questions about life. Everything he or she sees will find new and curious. They are full of energy and life. Yet, as the school starts and demands to follow the book, you shall see that joy of learning lessening and a struggle beginning. Slowly, that child will lose joy for learning, lose curiosity and will be criticised if it dreams too much or lives in its own world. If it can’t stand still, it will be diagnosed with ADHD and given pills. How is that normal? Children have lots of energy, it is normal, something that should be understood and let be, not trying to be fixed so that it can be just as everybody else. God forbid, a child tries to think on its own creatively and ask a teacher about it. Oh no, if it isn’t like that in the book it isn’t right. Nobody is made to sit still and repeat what it is written in the book, we were made for running and breathing and exploring on foot, living with nature, not amongst concrete walls.

And then that child grows. Becomes an adult that is now allowed to think on its own, but only slightly. Because, you still have to listen to your boss and to your government. You mustn’t question their orders, no matter how absurd they might seem. And to distract you from thinking too much about their actions, you are given an Iphone, a tv filled with movies and tv shows that project the same program you are living and mustn’t stray from. And if you get bored with them, don’t worry, every few months something new will come to distract you. A new fashion season that you absolutely must have, or a new computer model that you can’t live without. Don’t forget that new game that comes out this fall! Or a new app that is to die for. You must be In because it is so important to follow the trends displayed to you.


And no matter how miserable it might make you, how depressed, they won’t bother to do anything and shall diagnose it with middle-age crisis and thousands of others names instead of telling the truth. The life style offered to use makes us unhappy because it isn’t normal to go to the work that you don’t like, to live on junk food that destroys your body and makes you sick with time, to feel stressed and unhappy and is given pills for that because that is an only solution.

And the jobs? They need accountants so they promise it as a secure job. But, nothing is secure in this world. Anybody who lived life will know that. You can’t plan ahead no matter how much you calculate. Because when you think you have it all figured out, the life will flip the board and make it a chaos in your head once again. And nobody is the same, yet we are all forced into a same shape of a person, same life-style, same way of learning and same way of living. And you won’t be able to fit in it, not completely. And because of that, of trying to be something that isn’t you, but a programme put in your head that it must be so, you shall start to feel depressed, alone, confused and genuinely unhappy and you shall start to lash out in some way.

I learned that every dream I had about what person I could be isn’t something I truly wanted. If tomorrow someone offers me to be a movie star, I wouldn’t turn it down, but it wouldn’t be something that I would fight tooth and nail to get to be. Not one of those shapes of lifestyle offered to us I find desirable. Because I realised that not one of those lifestyles really gives you freedom. You have to let life decide, you have to be adjustable and agreeable with a strange flow of life because you can’t fight against it.


You, every one of you, tried to be exactly as shown in a movie or a tv show or a book and guess what, not one of you felt a true satisfaction at being that perfect illusion and you aren’t here to be perfect copies of some commercial. Because, tell me honestly, are you truly happy with your life? With your job, with your mind, with your knowledge, with the way you lead your life, with your success, with your family? And is all that as perfect as it is in a movie?


Tell me something. If you had a choice to do whatever you want in life and nobody demands anything of you, would you really go to college and have a stressful and sleepless lifestyle while attending it? Would you really wish for a secure job? Would you really want that large tv screen if it wasn’t shown in a commercial as a must have? I bet you wouldn’t. But, we are told again and again that it is how it must be so we start to believe it. I know what most people think when they read this “This one dreams too much, thinks life should be a fairytale. Wake up and get a job, stop wasting out time.”

Guess what, you are wasting your life to go to a job that makes you miserable so you can pay the bills so that you can go to work. Is that really a point of your life? To survive and then die like little soldiers that nobody will remember in the end?

If I am going to be become something I shall become it because life took me down that road, opened me that doors. I will make my life and I will trust life to take me where I need to go. Because I will arrive there either way, better go willingly.

I do not wish to be another individual in the crowd that comes from work and bemoans her job and her boss then get up again and go to work to the same thing all over again. Why are we doing that? If we are unhappy with this type of life being led, why do we help keeping it alive? Why are we so fanatic about the system collapsing when the system wasn’t even that good in the beginning?

More and more, I am astonished at how this life works and more and more I wish to find alternative to another life, one that I can be proud of living and say that I don’t regret not one day, good or bad.

I would like to hear your thoughts? Do you find some truth in all this or do you think I am wrong? What would you do if failure wasn’t an option and speak from the heart, not a programme you saw on a tv.



11 thoughts on “What is your life for?

  1. Hi Elly, You write from the heart and I can see you mean every word! I’m part of Blogging #101 and I hear what your saying about formal education. I’m a teacher, and left my secure job of five years last November to pursue a creative venture of my own. I fully understand the education system and your perspective on it! Trouble is, the majority of us need an education to do well in our society; that doesn’t mean you have to like it though. There’s nothing wrong with feeling like you do either, you are a ‘lifelong independent learner’! You will do well at whatever you attempt, because I can see you are a creative soul with a lot of talent. Thats obvious in your Blogging, even in these early stages! Go with your heart, “Have an unwavering belief in yourself and the rest will follow” (Lisa Messenger-Author Daring & Disruptive). Good Luck 🙂


    1. Wow, your words are beautiful. Truly, I am touched 😘 Today’s systems are slowly falling apart and there are more and more people that have similar view regarding the said systems as me. We saw how the systems treated the older generations and how they let them down. And there are more and more people that will turn their back to companies and try to make it on their own sheer talent.
      I am glad that you are searching and looking for more and I am happy you enjoyed the post.
      Thank you for the kind words and I wish you the best of luck


  2. I’ve often had similar thoughts, working a job I’m not particularly pleased with.

    What I do know is that real life has responsibilities and it’s not always possible to quit and do something I would enjoy more. I reconcile this by starting to explore other avenues and hopefully eventually pursuing something I am passionate about.

    I definitely do not want to wake up in 20 years and realize I have not done anything or followed my passions! Just personally trying to find a balance where I am financially secure before I take any crazy next steps! 🙂


    1. I do understand that life has responsibilities. After all, I never said life was easy, it is not supposed to be all milk and honey. I just mean that if it going to be difficult it doesn’t have to be because of the same thing as everybody else. We are a sick system. People became cruel, that is what I meant when I said people lash out. And we are taught more how to grab money, than how to find happiness. That’s the real problem. After all, you buy new stuff to feel happy, but you can’t really be happy for long with it. I am glad that you are trying to find a balance. Good for you. I wish you best of luck

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Definitely. I agree with the whole message of the post. I think if more people concentrated on pursuing their passions and finding happiness in life, the world would be a happier place in general.

        Well-written post!


  3. Awesome post! I completely agree about the education system. Creativity is just beaten from you as a kid. There’s no room for interpretation and that’s really unfortunate. I’m the same way, I’ve fluctuated back and forth between dozens of things. Only recently have I begun to narrow in on what I truly want. But I do think it’s important to pursue and try new things or else you can’t find what you truly love. When you do find the thing(s), I think it becomes an easy decision because you know there is nothing you would rather do. It’s worth every ounce of effort to achieve your dreams. The most difficult part is getting to that point and contemplating ‘what your life is for’ – as you mentioned. Really enjoyed reading this, great perspective.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I agree with you. It is important to search and learn and expirience what you might love. It is just a shame that this system doesn’t offers us that, but something else. We have to push and pull to get to what we love. But, I know. For me, it isn’t hard to stay up late to finish a post, but it is to even open a book for a test.
      But, in a way, I don’t think we can ever define what we truly want in words. I think we can just try to live it. Like some wise man said that I can’t remember the name: Life can only be understood backwards, but must be lived fowards.
      Anyway, I am glad you enjoyed it and I am glad that there more out there with the same view of things.
      Lots of love

      Liked by 1 person

  4. P.s: I’m from the blogging101 program too! I think you should change your header to something more graphically “clean”, try picmonkey.com! Anyway it’s just my opinion ^^


    1. I am glad that you liked the post and I am supposed to actually start college. Problem is, I lost all my will and desire for that kinda of learning somewhere in the middle of high school. I can’t stand the tests, or the professors way of teacing. I respect them as people, I just don’t respect the program. I remember when I took my philosophy book, put my earphones and with music started reading during philosphy class. by the end of the semestar I knew more and was ahead of the chapters where the class was. So, a professor sent me to compatetion on it and gave me extra books. I failed because the moment it registred in my head that it is for a test and for a deadline, I could’t read or remember anything because I was so sick of it. It almost became like a terror. I can learn on my own so long as there are no scheduel and tests to be taken. And that is a bit of a problem, but also, gives me a push to look for something else. I wish you best of luck with finding what you want. I know it is hard, I am there right now.
      As for the header. Gosh, thank you! I want the words also completely white, but it needs to be premium if I want it to be like I truly want. I’ll check it out.


      1. Thank you so much!
        Yes the exams can be so stressful, but think about the fact that you suffer now but when you’re finished – with school/uni I mean – you can actually work/do whatever you really like. It’s horrible to “adapt to the system”, but think about what you can have when you go beyond it. That’s what I say to myself when I’m struggling with university 🙂


      2. I belived that maybe two years ago. But, than I met people and they told me things how they studied to be banker let’s say and than they ended up in a movie bussiness. Or studied to be a teacher, have everything done so they can actually teach kids and started a security company. I get it that it helps you to go through uni and I applaud you for effort and will. But, I simply don’t see the point in it when even though you study, it doesn’t gurantee you anything. I once asked a succesful man what is more important on a job interview, a collage degree or experience. He told me, kids from collage recitate numbers and they fail. They don’t know how to present themselves because they don’t teach them that in college. What you need is to be charasmatic and open, a people person and make someone that is to hire you, believe you are a person for the job not because a paper says so, but because you make them want to trust you. I want to live, not study in a library. I am not a person for that and I already had so many people shake their head at me and murmer “You’ll regret it later.”, but I don’t think I will. Because I know I will be completely miserable if I go to a traditional instituation of schooling once again and would get nothing done. But, I can try living what I love immidietly. That’s one of the reason that I started blogging. To see if anybody would be willing to hear my voice 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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