Dreams of goals

Weed confession – I never really put it here that I tend to smoke from time to time. Mind you, my approach to it is either smoke for few days in a row, when I feel it  and then not smoke for a while. But, I tend to be like that with everyting in my life, so this is no suprise. I suppose I thought that people would feel against it and as such, wouldn’t wish to be part of this anymore, no matter how small it currently is. But, my conclusion about life right now is that honesty is the best policy.

The thing that I also found that weed can make my brain go in overdrive, thinking more deeply about things than really necessary for anyone who doesn’t like to complicate their lives. Me, for better or worse, do tend to do that. But, what I really wanted to share today is a short confession that I wrote that kinda describes my deeper current mindset which happened when I was high, thus he first paragraph.

I don’t wish to be succesful just,

I want to reach for the stars

Feel how it is to be a star

For she is made of what I am made of.

Not just see the wild waves and pass them through on my way to school

I want to feel them as I feel myself,

Totally and completely.

If that is not fullfilled, the ultimate happiness of living, how can I be happy?

Even if I have a success in business, the joy won’t be full because I would feel the emptiness

That only one with everything

remembering that I am a creator and planets,

birds and oak trees,

all that is, is me, as well.

Light and God,

One and everything.

That I am part of this energy that is everything and all.

It is the ultimate power, the ultimate truth.

And you truly know this,

And once you feel it and know by heart,

Then your conciousness and your mind will automatically know it, as well.

But, knowing intelectually is not all there is.

In fact, it is a lower level of knowing – learned theory, one that you may or may not apply in life and what use is that?

A level that you need, but is not enough.

However, it will happen on its own accord, you will know intelectually of itself if you know it first by feeling it, by breathing it, by living the truth.

Which is a joy to know, for now you can skip thousands of books

Who all tell you in the end the same truth.

Just live and be lived through,

Life wants to flow

Don’t stop it with fear spready by a mad society.

Let yourself live as a god on earth in a sense that what you think you become and that is ultimate godhood and so become true to your heritage.

Only that is the truth.

And only that matters.

We used to forget for we were playing and we wanted to take the play to the next level.

Now, we are stuck in this play for a moment of time.

And once we reach the truth again

We’ll probably want to forget again for it is the nature of play  and it is the only way that you can have the illusion of free will and free choice.

Only when you are cut of the whole, or better to say, your mind forgets it is part of the whole, can there be created an illusion of existence as a individual unit, Of self, of a personality that you use to function in this world of society and this form of existence.

But, once you remember, you go back to the universe level. You live and exist purely in the form of energy and there are no desires, no dreams, no past or future, only now.

And that’s why we like to play the game of forgetting.

After all, only in the game can we experience the ups and downs, joys and sorrows, in its illusionist form where everything can be created, from biggest peaks of humanity to worst tragedies that you can imagine and that makes all the fun in the world possible.

It is a bit reformed for the sake of better understanding for I wrote some sentences in the way that are not neither gramatically correct nor much understandable. However, this is something that occupies my mind a lot lately and hopefully, there are some individuals out there that think similary 🙂

Until next time,

Lots of love,





{Music. Eiffel 65 – Blue (KNY Factory Remix}

You would think the world is at fault with how much things can go wrong and how much we complain about it. But, since coming here, I became certain in two things in my life.

One – every situation that you find yourself in is defined by your way of looking into things and colouring them with your own perception, emotions and beliefs of life. So, if you are in a very bad position, it is due to your mind perception of a said situation. The situation simply is, if it is bad or not depends entirely on you. Because you will be the one who perceives it as it, so you can also change your perspectivness of it. So, basically, with enough flexibility and control to exercise it, you can change your surroundings simply by changing the way you look at them. Many people wish for happy feelings and when they feel uncomfortable or not completely content, they declare that situation bad.

Everything bad can become good. Same for good. Which brings me to my second conclusion.

Second thing is that if you are constantly failing at something or the things don’t work out the way you believed it should, the universe is simply giving you disguised directions. That way doesn’t work, try the other way, quite simple if you think about it. You just have to listen, pay attention to things that work out, the way you are doing something which in the end gives your result and then you will know which way and how to go. After all, you need to arrive somewhere and the energy that you put into something, even if it doesn’t work out, has to at one point come back to you. If you are starting a business or trying something new and it isn’t work out, it is alright. The effort you put into will be repaid in some ways later on. Simply because you toughened up through the difficult experience, it means that later on it will definitely be easier. It is a most known law of action and reaction. And the universe directs you in a bit of difficult way to the point where you need to go so that things become easier.

So, failure and the ability to adjust are your way of maturing to something better. It is all in the mind. So, if you control how the world around you can look, imagine how beautiful and magical you can make it happen. And what fun it is to actually play a game we call life. You just have to get up every day and start playing it and you won’t need this words to believe me, you will know it yourself.

Love and all the best in playing the game




Sunday rest and talks

{Music. Alan Walker – Fade}

To be honest, I like to watch people, observe them, learn them and then move on.

I like to talk to them for a moment or a day, depending on how interesting I find them, and go back to my shadowy corner once I am done.

That is to say, I am not exactly a people person. Throw a horde of dogs, cats, or any animal there is, I would be content to spend my day, lazing around and playing with the little bundles of joy that they are to me. Throw people at me and it isn’t that easy. It depends on the type of people, the energy around them, their mindset and my general mood for me to able to spend a whole day with them and enjoy every second of it.

I think working on a reception isn’t all that for me. I can smile prettily, but damn, I like the honesty. I like telling a person, okay, I am not in a mood, stop talking to me. Not that harshly, unless the person is being annoying, but it is the general ability to do so that counts. If you can, you don’t have a need to all that much, you leave or put on the headphones. If you can’t,well, it starts to nag at you like a terrible itch that just keeps getting worse.

And I don’t know, but even though your face shows that you are clearly not interested, they just keep talking. It is like they never have a chance to share their experience or thoughts or anything before being interrupted and once they start, they seemingly can’t stop. It is worryingly because, well, everyone should be able to feel content all the time, not feeling bottled up.

Btw, found this little babe right now, so that is the music theme for this post today {Music. Alan Walker – Fade}

So, in a terrible worry that I don’t become one of those people without knowing, I will be the terrible bore here, expressing all my complicated feelings and thoughts that are jumbled up like headphones cords once you put them in the bag.

Thankfully, you only need to click the back button to get the hell out of here. But, if you stay… Well, lots of virtual kisses for you. And lots of very real love from me.

That’s about it from the rambling of mine.

Next time, I hope that a sweet story will come from this fingers of mine and clicked away towards your Reader for your lovely eyes.

Until tomorrow,



p.s. Thanks for listening.

p.p. Cover photo doesn’t really have anything to do with this post, but it just so wonderful and a really great advice in my opinion.


It’s who you really are

Philosopher post – think it will become a weekly thing.

What is it about? My thoughts on life, on what is.  I wish to record it, share it,.see if anyone thinks similar or is inspired by this. Today it is inspired by this video:

{Inspiration – CHAPPiE – Who am I in this body? by theJourneyofPurpose}

Who am I?

A question we start to ask when our surroundings points out to us that they have everything labeled and as such, we start to search for our own label – A nerd, popular jock, a saint, a sinner, thousands of options, but none seems to fit forever and perfectly.

Everything put in categories: old, young, wise, stupid, educated or not, more or less, yet we always search for more, look beyond all that.

We don’t live for labels, we live because we are alive.

A child is not defined by age so much as it is by its act, its innocence, its view of the world. A child doesn’t questions himself. When you start to grow you start to search for an answer. And then you continue to search. What am I? Am I the body? Or am I this mysterious soul that I can’t touch, see or measure in any way? How do I know if I am anything?

I learned that while our brain only processes and allows us 15 things per second, there are 15 billions of things happening around us at the same time. So the world that we have around us, so colorful and full, is just the smallest percent of what there is. And how wacky is that? We barely know everything that is out there, we basically don’t know anything, let alone the truth of the world. We simply don’t have the means.

And it is true, is it not? Do you actually feel breath? Everyone breaths, in and out, every second of their life. Yet, we don’t feel that breath. Try it. You feel the dryness on the throat, you feel the effects of a breath and you categorize it as a breath. But, you don’t really feel it. And how sad is that? That a thing so necessary for life, the main fuel we need, we don’t ever actually feel. We are not aware of it, just like we are not aware of what we truly are. How many other things aren’t we really aware and there they are, peacefully waiting?

Can we truly live than, when we don’t even know the fundamentals of the world, of us. Don’t we just become lost personalities, throwing ourselves at jobs and hobbies, rules and structures so that we occupy our mind in order that we could never ask such simple, but terrifying questions. Questions that crush such social structures to the ground.

Because, once you start asking them, you start to think about them, you can’t go back. It nags at you, you wish to find the answer to what you are. How can I become something more if I don’t know what I am right now?

However, maybe, that is the secret of life. A flower doesn’t need to know what it consists of for it to grow. It doesn’t need school or someone teaching for it to bloom. Maybe, if we stayed simpler, we would be more natural and one with life and there would be no need for such simple questions. Because, maybe, we would be like children, curious and happy with life, simple and beautiful, gentle and honest – just like life.

Maybe, we just need to learn to be happy and not succesful or rich or desirable or perfect.

Truth is simple. Lie is complicated.

What do you wanna be? Simple or complicated?