Love is all you got

{Music. Lisa Mitchell – Neopolitan Dreams (Niklas Ibach Remix)}

People fall in love so easily. It is in our nature to love and to connect with others around us, to care and be part of the group. It is obvious by our customs and way we live that we want love, yet we rarely truly love. We set boundaries for ourselves and expectations for other people to meet them and we kill the love we feel at the start simply because we don’t accept it as it is, but demand something else from it, something that is only in our minds.

If we truly let ourselves go, we would fall in love in an instant. We would fall in love at the bright, blue sky filled with soaring birds over and over again and our heart would sing with joy at the sight of a sunrise and sunset every time we encountered its rays of light. Falling in love is easy as it is breathing. It comes natural and fills us up with a natural flow of nature and universe. Loving is part of us. It is easier for us to simply love than to learn how to hate you. A smile can make you love; years of pain and anger makes you hate – the difference is clear.


A problem with society is that it shows us false beliefs about love that we take and stick to and teaches how to fear and not how to love. The false beliefs we learn come mostly from romantic books and movies that we so devour. We all want love, yet you don’t need to acquire it as we are told to do. It is not waiting for us in Paris or in someone special. It is in you and you just need to love. Love yourself first, love your life first, love people around you and you shall see how it spreads out in a beautiful swirl of joy. Have you noticed you can’t define love? Or falling in love? We try by saying he fell in love with her eyes or she fell in love at his kind nature. Because she can dance or because he can be unexpectedly romantic. Because of this or that, but what may work for one person to feel love doesn’t mean it will work for the other. Some girls wants flowers, some girls want a leather jacket and motorcycle ride. Some guys want a romantic dinner, others want a laid back evening on a couch in sweatpants.

The point is that everybody is different yet we all want love. Love will express itself in everybody differently. You can’t define love, you can only feel it and keep it safe. And when I say keeping it safe, I mean not let your expectations stop your from simply feeling and enjoying yourself no matter of the boundaries other throw at you. Just because someone isn’t as tall as you want or doesn’t texts you “Good morning” and “Good night” or doesn’t surprise you with a cooked dinner, doesn’t mean love isn’t there. Or is younger or older or isn’t someone your friends or people around you approve. Love isn’t checking things off from the list, it just is and you can accept it and enjoy it or you can ignore it and feel frustrated and unhappy at the end of the day. Real love is easy and doesn’t put us in any stereotypical shape that we so lean towards. When we truly let go than we truly love. We don’t put expectations on ourselves or on others. No one is required to meet your expectations and you are not required to meet any of theirs.

The one who loves unconditionally is lucky and reaches the true bliss, not the one that is loved. It is love that we ourselves experience which makes us children at heart again, happy and fulfilled, seeing life with vibrant colors and beautiful sounds.

Remember, you are the one that invokes the light through your eyesight, the one who decided is it hot or cold for you, too much or not enough. The reality just is and it changes in our perception and our choice at how to perceive it. That is our free will. We are free to see the world however we chose to and we have to power to change that view anytime we want. How will you perceive the world around you depends on you what you feel and how you think.

{Music. Hozier – Take me to Church}    buuuu1

If you feel love and see new opportunities and find creative way to achieve something, life will be much more beautiful, filled with bliss and feeling content. If you feel fear and judge everything and everyone, a negative comment coming faster to your lips than does the positive one, your world will be bleaker, less magical and much more dull, almost a misery to live.

I wish you best of luck in simply loving and getting rid of any judgments our brain is programmed to bring up and to experience the life to its fullest which goes beyond just a paid job and a roof over your head.

With lots of love



Gossips and hopes of wisdom

{Music. Parov Stelar – Coco}

you are

Knowledge expands your horizons. It changes the way you think, the way you see, the way you process. It is useful, helpful and enlightening. Yet, we are not taught to see or to understand. So many things, we are thought to ignore, to focus on unnecessary things. Has anyone noticed that you were silently aware of some things, but until someone sits you down and explain it to you in clear word, you don’t see it? I guess that is the main proof we only bother to use barely five percent of our brain.

I guess I was pretty naive as a child. I wasn’t so many around kids as I was around cartoons and toys. My parents friends often were people who travelled or seemed to be from another time, the time that was discussed deeper side of politics, art, philosophy, music, things that fueled a child’s imagination to unimaginable heights. I found it wonderful when they said to quote Shakespeare or said Socrates teachings. I wished to grow up, learn it all so I can discuss that, as well. Child’s imagination.


As I said, people have a superpower of ignoring things they don’t want to face. So, I ignored many things, putting things in my perception until people and situations fitted it.

There are many stuff that I could discuss from that, but one thing I want to focus on is that became a bit clearer to me a few days ago, but I thought about for years on end. As a child I naively thought that only kids gossiped. Ridiculous, I know, but true nevertheless. And the reason for that in head was that children gossiped about one another simply because they had nothing better to discuss. Of course they are going to laugh about how someone who fell down in front of the whole school rather than relish in the wisdom of Aristotle because they simply didn’t know better. And, for a while, that explanation worked perfectly for me. At the time, I wasn’t so much aware of it as I am today. It was one of those silent explanation that you have about something and that you only realize later on when time has passed and you can see more clearly. You truly understand yourself and your actions more when something passed and not when you are in midst of it.


I found myself lonely back then because I desired for someone with whom I could share more than just what happened on Friday and who went to cinema with whom (to be clear, it was middle school so teenage stuff was just starting to reel its head). So, I turned to books. So many wonderful stories and so much to learn from them. I turned to movies and found magic created behind a glass surface, just a touch away. Turned towards my imagination and stories about Jesus. About his words of love and care and forgiveness towards everyone. Of course, once you discover how hypocritical people can be, especially in religions, those who claim that are virtues and yet are no better, the idea of standing besides them and listen to them turned very unappealing.

But, growth means learning and it was the change that shocked me as it happened. The first dream was shattered when I opened my eyes and ears and realised that grown people gossiped just as much as kids and about the same thing. Only difference was they could drink coffee, smoke cigarettes and say curse words freely. I felt so disappointed because all my dreams of being a sophisticated lady and discussing great words, were dashed away.


Than, another shock came when I realised how much my parents gossiped, as well. To be clear, they didn’t sound the same as the kids around me and my ability to ignore things that didn’t fit in the way that I saw things kicked in to protect my dreams about them. After accepting all that, I started to wonder more and more why people gossiped so much. One thing is to be a social person and to share stories. It is another to put another person down so that you can feel better about yourself. Because, let’s face it. That is the reason behind all that habit of gossiping. If someone screwed up more than you or the way they live life is decided to be worse than yours, you feel better about yourself and your way of living. We wouldn’t actually be happy if everybody was content and perfect, not with this current mindset. And we are taught to have this mindset. What else is the magazines and tv talk shows and dozens of other things, than a global gossip network that teaches us how to act and what to talk about? And most often than not, they have a nasty thing to say about someone rather than a good one.

{Music. The Neighbourhood – Alleyways}

Constant negativity and nastiness is tiring for me. And what is worse, it is hard to meet positive people. Truly positive ones that are realistic, but don’t immediately jump on what could go wrong than rather think about how could it be good. I want to be positive and I try not to be pulled into depressive, monotone way of living that so many live by, but it is not easy to resist the habit and the majority. So many people prefer to be a victim rather than a master of its fate. I am trying to learn to take the control back, to learn a new way rather than just blame everyone around me and mope in misery and say how everybody is terrible to me. They are not. Cuz, their thoughts and words don’t control or define me yet we all act as if they do. And we act as if our opinion is going to change somebody.


I wish to sit with someone and not talk about anybody else or have them complain about that or another because everybody knows that those problems will not be half as important a year from now on and instead just share funny stories or thoughts and laugh at silliness and feel better about life rather than worse. I had that with maybe, three persons, at most in my whole life. Two people with whom that happened on more than one occasion and it was wonderful to experience and have.

{Music. Jetta – I’d Love to Change the World}

I wonder if you today had a good laugh and felt better or groaned and started talking how somebody did something that annoyed you so much. What makes you feel better, in the end? Do you want to look back at your life and realize you spent it discussing about someone and something that nobody made feel better or taught you anything. A waste of time and as such, a waste of life.

I feel lucky and blessed when I can find someone to talk about things that genuinly interest me and that aren’t connected to discussing someone elses way of life. I think I feel better now in my life. I am starting to realize things and it requires change because, as I said, when you learn something new, it will change things, and I am trying to make the best of it. Trying to make a path that doesn’t follow the same mainstream of everybody else. And, I suppose both you and I will see how it goes.

Maybe this was inspiring to you and if so, I am glad. If not, well, too bad.

Lots of love,


P.S. I dare you to buy a flower and give it to someone who you gossip about the most on your coffee breaks and see how it goes.

healthy mind

Lucy Bear

Lucy Bear came as a complete surprise in my head, but a most welcomed one. I wished to write something else entirely, but it seems my love for magic and dreams and maybe a bit of Alice in Wonderland, decided to create this instead. I believe magic exists in some form because life can truly be magical. And sometimes, I think that many of us forget that too soon. So, I hope you like this little beauty and enjoy her adventure.


{Music. Magic}

Lucy Bear was an unusual girl. Her imagination could take her anywhere and she drew it up on any free, blank paper she could find. One day she woke up mysteriously early and bounded downstairs to get some warm milk with honey as the sun lazily peaked out through the hill.

Her dad was standing in the kitchen, in a pristine suit with warm eyes and a smile as he looked up at her.

“Lucy Bear!”, he greeted.

“Good morning, Daddy!”, Lucy replied and went for her morning hug which she didn’t get a lot. Mr. Charlie would usually already be at work by the time sleep left her eyes.

“I got you something, Lucy Bear.”, Mr. Charlie says and pulls out a pale, blue covered book in hard print. “Here you go, Lucy Bear, for your drawing.”, he says presenting to her a brand new sketchbook and a row of markers.

Lucy squealed in delight and happily took it, giving a big kiss to her dad.

“You are the best dad at this whole world!”

Her dad than left with a smile, disappearing in a sunshine ray through the closing door.

Lucy bounded upstairs, back to her room and looked around, looking at what she is to draw first.

Her eyes settled on a white, fluffy teddy bear that she got since she was little on one White Christmas.


Mr. Winkles, was his name and his fur was the softest there is. He sat proudly atop of her white dresser, standing out amongst other dolls and toys.

Lucy Bear sat down on the edge of the bed and cracked open her sketchbook and markers.

She drew out an outline of her bear and then started coloring with delight, colors merging and flowing out like watercolors making Lucy Bear gasp in delight. She now thought that her dad truly is the best there is in the world for this markers were the best in the whole world. How lucky she was.

She carefully colored Mr. Winkles blue bow and the inside of his ears in light pink color.

She glanced up, unsure if Mr. WInkles eyes were brown or black, only to find Mr. Winkles looking at her with alive, deep amber eyes. Lucy Bear’s eyes widen at the sight, looking at Mr. Winkles who now sat straighter and more natural, like she would if she was as small as him and on top of the dresser.

“Mr. Winkles!”, Lucy Bear examines. “You are alive!”

Mr. Winkles smiles and hops on his fluffy feet.

“Why didn’t you say so, Mr. Winkles? And here I thought you were only a stuffed bear! But, you aren’t, are you? Just think how much fun we could have had Mr. Winkles if only you said something earlier!”, Lucy Bear says with wide eyes.

Mr. Winkles walked over to the small board that was on the dresser and propped up against the wall and took up a marker for it. Than, he started to write carefully.

Dear Lucy,

It is good to finally meet you.

Thank you

Lucy Bear walks over to her dresser and looks at Mr. Wrinkles than at the message.

“It is good to finally meet you, as well, Mr. Winkles.”, She says and carefully pets him on the head.

If possible the fur seemed even softer.

“What is thank you for?”, Lucy Bear asks and Mr. Winkles takes to a pen once again, writing below the first set of words.

For being my friend

This made Lucy Bear’s heart melt and the bear and her gazed at each other for a moment before pulling each other in the hug.

“Oh, Mr. Winkles. I shall always be your friend as you are mine.”, Lucy Bear whispers.

They stay like that – a girl with curly, golden hair and her white bear holding one another with bird’s song in their ears, a feel of each other and a rustle of clean, white curtains fluttering in the wind combined in a most peaceful moment they both have felt in their short lives.

They pull apart and Lucy Bear says.

“Now, Mr. Winkles. It absolutely important that we have some fun.”

Mr. Winkles smiles, pulls at her finger and hops of the dresser as Lucy Bear curiously watches him. He runs for the door and disappears behind them. Lucy Bear’s grabs her sketchbook and markers, heading after him. Mr. Winkles leads them down the stairs and through the back doors out in the garden filled with warmth and smell of spring. They pass by the drying clothes that leaves of a scent of freshness in the air and stop before a bush of roses.


Mr. Winkles sat down and pats the seat besides him. Lucy Bear obediently sits down, arranging her skirts until they are to her liking and propping her sketchbook in her lap. She looks curiously at her bear and he taps at her sketchbook once, twice, before pointing at a rose-bush. Getting the message, Lucy Bear once again opens her sketchbook and takes a marker.

She starts outlining one of the closed rose’s along with others and then colors it, the vivid red and soft pink mixing in a fresh shade with deep green to accompany the steam. Lucy Bear looks up only to see the rose opening up in rapid movement. To her astonishment, it revealed a delicate creature as the petals parted with dew falling from their sides.

A fairy. With a glow to her and twitching wings that sparkle as they fluttered on the warm breeze. The fairy rose its tiny head and looked up at them from her fetus position. Her blood-red eyes met Lucy Bear’s and Lucy Bear wished for a fairy to be her friend. As if hearing her thought the fairy’s wings snapped, once, twice and she rose in the air, more of a sparkle of light than anything else.

She flew to them and landed in Lucy Bear’s outstretched palm.

She was beautiful.

Than, to Lucy Bear’s happiness, other roses started to open up, revealing fairie’s companions. They started to flutter about them and Lucy Bear jumped to her feet, spinning in the circle as the fairies danced in the air around her. Laughter spilled from Lucy Bear’s lips and soon even Mr. Winkles was dancing in the air, fairies pulling him about and twirling him around. Lucy Bear bowed as Mr. Winkles was presented to her at the same level of her eyes. Mr. Winkles returned the bow with fairies help and then they were all dancing the valcer around the garden and Lucy Bear felt as she was floating too even though she was the only one with her feet on the ground.

As their dance came to the end, they once again all bowed to each other and Mr. Winkles was sat to the ground.

Then Mr. Winkles showed them the way to the big, old oak, fairies fluttering about, and pointed at the tree than at her sketchbook. All excited, Lucy Bear took to drawing once again.

Outlines. Colors. Magic.


And the leaves in the old oak seemingly shivered before tiny, lime green lights floated from them. The lights rose, as many as there are leaves on the oak and swirled around Lucy Bear, making her twirl. When she rightened herself once again, she saw the whole tree enfolded in lines of golden light that crisscrossed and zigzagged around, but still in perfect harmony.

“What is that, Mr. Winkles? Little fairies?”, Lucy Bear asks curious.

Mr. Winkles looks at the fairies knowingly and waits. The fairies gather closer and Lucy Bear can hear their tiny voices, chiming like little bells. Together they whispered.

Energy, energy…

“Energy? My! Why, that means everything is alive than!”, Lucy Bear says.

Yes, yes…

Fairies confirm.

Lucy Bear continues to draw and soon there are small birds chirping from her shoulders and Mr. Winkles head, butterflies that grew before her eyes and with a flicker of wings multiplied, lights that were now in every color imaginable. When she drew water from a nearby puddle in the pot, little beings made from water shot up, dancing around on air as if it was the most easy thing there is. Stones started to move, playing chase with fairies and the nature breathed with new shine.


Lucy Bear drew, drew and drew, colors mingling in patterns of beauty and light.

Leaves and petals took their positions besides fairies and lights and everybody danced with the music of birds and chimes of fairies and breeze of the wind.

Lucy Bear remembered laughing and dancing, looking at the miracle before her with sky in the background and nature in the air.

“Lucy Bear! Lucy Bear! Where are you?”, came a distant voice and Lucy Bear opened her eyes. She was laying on the warm grass, her curls around her face. She propped herself up and looked about. Mr. Winkles was lying a feet away, once again still like an ordinary bear. But, Lucy Bear knew better. The colors seemed less bright now and none of her new friends were around, but Lucy Bear wasn’t afraid. She knew exactly the truth now. Everything is possible.

She grins, picks up Mr. Winkles and studies him. He looks back, the warm amber returned to deep brown. But, than he winked, amber flashing for a second and Lucy Bear pulls him into a hug. She grabs her sketchbook and looks in wonder at dozens of drawings, looking like photographs, painting her morning adventure. She flickers through, seeing her dance with fairies and Mr. Winkles even though she touched no marker to the page at the time and thinks magic is truly amazing.

“Oh, Mr. Winkles. How amazing this is! I must thank you so much for this adventure and hopefully many more to come.”, Lucy Bear says to Mr. WInkles, takes her sketchbook markers and walks over to her house, to her mom’s voice and radio music that drifted jazz in the air.


Lucy Bear may have not seen them, but she could feel a pairs of red eyes watching her walk away with smiles on faces and flicker of wings in the air behind soft petals, hidden away.


I hoped you like it and enjoyed yourself.

All the best and lots of love


You are my dream reader

{Music. Haichi }

Maybe a long time ago I wrote for someone specific, but now I find writing for myself and than… For everyone else. I want everyone to read it and find it enjoyable. If not, I wish to improve myself until they do. So, basically, my dream reader would be everyone in the world. Everyone that would need a bit of inspiration,a bit of love, a bit of laugh. This is for you.


Dear reader,

I am gonna tell you a story about a little person which was created to explore life with everybody else.

little person

The little person learned from the world around it, from its people and nature surrounding it. The sounds would be recorded and the words remembered. From them it would recognize the patterns of speech that turned into stories. From stories it first learned what it later experienced. It learned to move and change. To show its emotions with movement of body and face and signal them through sound. So it grew.


It discovered the birds in the sky, the bones in the sand and the laughter in the air. It learned the joy of drinking water on the scorching day and what it means to go with a flow of snow down the hills of mountain peaks. Seen the plants growth and felt the roughness of the tree. Touched warmth of the fire and refreshment of sea. Sang as it skipped on the river’s bank and danced around as it discovered new places and corners of the world, learning along with others around it, greeting a Sun with wide arms and joy in the eyes.


Learned what gentle hand does to a heart and what sadness feel like. What a laugh can accomplish and a smile to someone can bright up the day. How fulfilling free love is and how joy makes you jump higher than possible. How work can be made easier with a song and it pays off to give something up to find something new. How relaxation under the tree makes a head lighter and a soul fonder. How a simple touch can skip your heart and what discovery of oneself can be.


Time and again, life moves us all, little persons, in direction we have no knowledge where it will end or how will it progress. We can only smile, accept the change and say “Thank you for this gift of life.”


Thank you for reading.



Blogging 101: Names and Dreams

{Music. Dillon – Thirteen Thirty-five }

   I am quite content with my name. In fact, I put a lot of thought in it before I even started to search for the best blog site there is. I was between Lucy and Elly, but Elly won the prize for this one. Today came from my wish to live fully in the present, at the moment.

I have a tendency to indulge into fantasizing about the future or reminiscing on the past and what would happen if I was a bit different then, more like the one I am today – whatever that is. I long to live in a moment and sometimes I succeed, but sometimes I slip when I am left to my own devices with absolutely nothing to do. Than music starts along with thoughts.

As many may have found out already, breaking a habit is hard work. No matter how much time has passed, habits tend to find a way back in without you even noticing. It is like slumping your back and if you weren’t raised military style and have a problem like I do, you know what I am talking about. You straighten up, shoulders back, spine straight with head held high and strut away. But then, after half an hour, you find yourself slumped and bowed down, your back returning to the familiar position in which they spent so many long hours when you were in front of a computer.

The same deal is with thoughts, so is everything in life. To break away the habit completely you would have to cleanse your mind completely, go back to zero where you were once when you were a kid. Do you remember the life as a kid? Everything is fascinating, everything is new and interesting. You don’t plan ahead what you will eat or do tomorrow. You play as it struck your fancy, constantly inspired with new things and ideas and thoughts. You don’t get attached to things. Even when you are unhappy when parents pull you away from your new playground and you throw a tantrum thinking everything is terrible, as a child you will find yourself not caring few hours later, already finding a new amusement.

Yet now, all of your thoughts are 99% the same as they were a day before or even a week before. It is statistically proved that most people only get from 4 to 6 completely new ideas a year and most people never act upon them because it would mean to do something completely different. Your thoughts are the same and they start the action of your body. So if they are the same, so are your habits. If you want to change habits, you need to change your mind. Sounds impossible, right? How do you change the way your brain works? How do you clean it from all the unnecessary crap that resides there and constantly makes itself known, not helping you in the slightest? Some start with training their body and as it changes so does their mind. Some completely change their social circles, meeting new people and starting blank. You shall find that if you are a lot around unhappy people, you get pulled down, as well. Same goes if surround yourself with positive or succesful people. And some, like me, meditate or do something in that style. You basically slowly clean yourself from all the stress and worries that you collected in yourself for years and that you collect daily. It helped me greatly in this past five years that I am practising meditation. I would not be a person I am today without it. It helped me let go of many things and thoughts and as such, create space in where I could learn things to improve myself mentally and emotionally, and even physically.

However, it is a process and still my thoughts wander off to either past or future which they have no business doing. Thinking about the future means nothing if you aren’t working in the present moment on making it happen. Blogging is also a way to improve my writing with your help so that some dreams don’t stay dreams.

Dreams – I found lately that I felt most content when I made others happy and make them laugh. When I showed them care and love (which I believe, if it was expressed more freely people wouldn’t feel so unhappy all the time) instead of a stony face, even some of the closed up people opened up easily enough. It is a joy to see it and experience it. So, happiness and love. Spread that shit everywhere.

Beauty… I love beauty, I see it everywhere I turn. In pale eyes of an old homeless guy, in a shine and flutter of bird’s wing soaring through a sky, in a belly hurting laughter and joyful face, in beautiful, happy people and talents expressed. Do not be surprised if a post or two springs up dedicated to a beauty of some talented person that I find enchanting. Speaking of talents {Music video. JustSomeMotion  Caravan Palce – Brotherswing}

I love how free people can be and sad that so people don’t let themselves be free in their speak, movement and beliefs because of the harsh society and fear of mockery they might experience from their peers when they show their uniqueness and difference. You don’t even know how many talents you have and what you can be and you don’t even let yourself explore it and show. Great artists and people didn’t become great because they blended in the crowd. We all want to be great and famous yet around others we try to be the same as them. A bit of contradictory, isn’t it? Be free for you only have one life to be that.

And last, art. Gosh, where do I even start? I was raised walking the theater halls and Vienna opera houses along with concerts and sounds of piano while meeting people recognized in their field. And I see art everywhere – in the seemingly chaotic nature around us, in bright colors of the sky as the Sun touches the edge of Earth, in changing layers of oceans, in people and their movement, in the way that we are all so different yet exactly the same, in a gradual flow of time that transforms a gangly teenager in a graceful person full of life and later wisdom earned through life, in the frequencies of music as it makes you move, in cities filled with new and old structures, decorated with lights alight at night looking like a most beautiful Christmas tree, in dancing flames and colorful fabric that moves through air.

Art isn’t just a well-connected mix of colors on canvas or a symphony of tones and foot movement. It is everywhere around you and when you realize that, you learn to see it. And, here is the greatest secret many have forgotten – you, yourself is pure art and unique in your existence. So take care that your life is as best as it can be for it is your work of art and what you leave to others.

Another thing that I am missing, but shall have to add to my tagline is inspiration for I want to inspire people and have them inspire me in return. This is where magic is made.

Peace and love,