{Music. Kygo feat. Maty Noyes – Stay}

 

It’s strange how thoughts just start to follow one another. I never thought before much about romance and yet now, since coming to this magical place of London, people that I find beautiful and fascinating just keep popping up and they become gorgeous in my eyes the more I get to know them. Honestly, I don’t even know where to turn and focus, on which person to look at more. And they all equally deserve the same focus because they are all equally enchanting in their own ways. It is a hardship, but in a certain sweet kind of way if that makes sense.

Don’t know how much others experienced this transaction from one end to the other in their life, but it can be quite enlightening about what kind of person you can become and what you can do to make others happier and what kind of actions can make others sad.

But, it is actually disturbing when you realize how much we give up responsibility. Not gonna say give up control because if we really did give up control fully and enjoy whatever came to our life then it would be way easier and more fulfilling to live it. But, people always place the reason and the responsibility of their happiness on other people.

He is my boyfriend so he has to take care of me just the way I like it and I will be happy. If he doesn’t, I feel sad and that is his fault.

My mom didn’t congratulate me my birthday today so I am depressed.

My teacher didn’t praise me today so I will not study for her class anymore.

My friend didn’t text me back…

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One hundred and one reason of why you feel sad and then you place the blame on others like it is their job to make you happy. Every person is responsible for only one person and one person only – and that is itself.

Every other action taken to make someone else happy is considered a gift, not an obligation. And as such, should be valued whenever given and not angered or sad when not.

Why not? Simply because if you yourself first can’t make yourself happy than no one can make you happy, not truly. Because you will always depend on that person to make you happy and that is never a way of being happy for long. Then it is fleeting and usually brings more pain than pleasure.

Also, if you can’t be happy with yourself and expect others to make you happy, you are actually putting a horrible burden on others and even worse responsibility that nobody wants and they always leave in the end because it is an impossible task to fulfill.

I honestly think that many people approach relationships wrong. They approach usually with an illusion of what the person should be and is. As they meet they adjust their perspective one way or other. Expectations follow. I’ll be stereotypical here simply to make a point, not to make it seem as if it is truly like that. A girl wants flowers before every date, guys want sex after every date. If it is not fulfilled, they don’t like it and put the blame on the other significant.

That is no way to really go about because you will always end up disappointed in the end. No one can meet your expectations fully because no one can read your mind and no should actually. Everyone is their won person and what you expect is the extension of your persona and to expect someone to fill up all the check points is impossible to achieve.

But, love… Love can change all that. Just loving, not forcing or changing anything or anyone, just feeling that joy and love. Dance and sign with it. Work and create with it changes you and later on the world for the better.

After all, there is a reason for the saying love yourself first before you can love anybody else. Well, I am not sure that is really how it goes, but the point is the important one. Once you learn to enjoy yourself, you want need others to make you feel joy. But, sharing is caring and thus sharing your joy with someone familiar will just intensify it for the better and that makes a true relationship matter all the more.

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A golden coin

{Music. Kygo – Firestone (& others)}

For a while, I had thoughts tumbling though my head of action and reaction. Everything you do kinda get’s back at you, and everything you do also affects others in different ways. Like waves in the oceans who glide and slide, overlap and emerge in a dance as they follow one another without a thought or conscious decision. You start one thing and it leads to a completely unexpected development. It inspired this little story here.

An older gentleman was walking down the square littered with stands filled with fresh vegetables and fruits. He came to buy his wife a bouquet of flowers as he did every Sunday for past 28 years. White lilacs, he chosen for today and wore them proudly in the crook of his arm, with a content smile on his face.

Passing a corner, he saw an elderly woman sitting on a floor, face creased in frowns and hand stretched out in an endless plea. Feeling specially inclined on that fine day, he took out a shiny golden coin and one lilac flower and gave them to the old woman with a smile peaking from his trimmed and shaped mustaches. His arm felt lighter without a large, bubbling lilac head and heart lighting up at the look of wonder and joy spreading through woman’s face making it for a slip of the second look young and child-like again, as the hooded eyes opened up in wonder, smile revealing a few missing teeth and forehead smoothing out from its saddened life struggles.

The golden coin twinkled through the leathery fingers. The gentleman tipped his hat and left. The flower withered away in a slip of the time. The coin travelled in a pocket of a dress until the woman felt hunger beyond tell and gave it in exchange of a hot meal and good night’s sleep.

The young, pimply out-of-school man slipped it in his pocket instead of the cash register. He took it home and played with it under the light’s lamp, admiring its unique shine, deciding one day he will have millions of coins like this starting immediately. The next day, as he hurried to work with new determination and plan, pushing through the hordes of people and city yells and shouts, the coin silently slipped from his pocket and flew through air in a graceful, but unseen arch and scattered around the feet of hurrying people. It finally settled once the morning rush subdued and in sudden calmness it’s light attracted a young woman’s eye. She picked it up and decided it is a sign. You see, that day she had a job interview that she wasn’t sure she wanted to even go to, purely for the reason of thinking she wasn’t adequate enough. The lucky coin gave her a sign to not, after all, change her mind and call her friend to spend the day moaning and whining away.

She shouldered her bag full with her art and portfolio and headed to a new possibility. She twisted and turned the lucky coin in her palm through the whole thing and when three days later, she got a phone call that she is accepted, kissed the coin and run down to the fountain at the small square on which her balcony looked over. With a wide smile she flicked it in the air and watched its descend into the clear water surrounded by marble and wished it to bring luck to somebody just as it did to her.

The coin happily shined along with others numberless coins at the bottom of the fountain.

Seconds or hours later, curious boy leaned over the edge and spied the golden coin. When his mother wasn’t looking, quickly as a kitten, he reached out and took it, mindful to take no other. Raising it towards the sky, his eyes sparkled at finding such treasure just like all those pirates did in stories his mama read him. He took it home with him, inspecting it every now and then, caressing the smooth flat surface with small engravement of a butterfly and caterpillar on the other.

It stayed with him until one day, a boy’s mother refused to buy him a new toy. Defiant ad angry at a such an abrupt and unexpected rejection, he stepped up to the counter, laying the toy and the coin with an angry pout. The cashier raised its eyebrows, but inspecting the coin, approved and wrapped the toy much to the child’s delight and mother’s confusion.

The coin shortly lived in a darkness of the register for the other time it opened, it was taken out for an exchange of a largely quota bill and given to smiling old grandma and was put in a small purse.

The old grandma had a granddaughter who she loved dearly and always gave her something at the end of her visit.

This visit she set her down and started her flow of wise and gentle words.

“My dear, whatever you do, do it with kindness and honest heart. Wherever you go, bring joy rather than sorrow. Accept change for it walks hand in hand with both life and death and it is their best friend. Learning is a gift to appreciate and sharing is a way of love. Love is a jewel when found demanding to be nourished and cherished with beautiful thoughts and small joys, not smothered by petty jealousies and resentments. Be strong, kind and positive for than beauty will fall through your eyes and your heart will heal others. Whatever you do, do it your best, even if you don’t like it. Wherever you go, go with open heart and understanding mind. Those, child, are the secrets to a wonderful life. And this is to remind you of that every day until it is engraved in foundations of your life.”, and she took the coin out and gave it to the young granddaughter with a smile. “My dear, love is all we got and a smile never hurted anybody.”

What if we all had a small coin that gleaned and reminded us of a joy that life can be?

With love and coins,

Ellie

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Love is all you got

{Music. Lisa Mitchell – Neopolitan Dreams (Niklas Ibach Remix)}

People fall in love so easily. It is in our nature to love and to connect with others around us, to care and be part of the group. It is obvious by our customs and way we live that we want love, yet we rarely truly love. We set boundaries for ourselves and expectations for other people to meet them and we kill the love we feel at the start simply because we don’t accept it as it is, but demand something else from it, something that is only in our minds.

If we truly let ourselves go, we would fall in love in an instant. We would fall in love at the bright, blue sky filled with soaring birds over and over again and our heart would sing with joy at the sight of a sunrise and sunset every time we encountered its rays of light. Falling in love is easy as it is breathing. It comes natural and fills us up with a natural flow of nature and universe. Loving is part of us. It is easier for us to simply love than to learn how to hate you. A smile can make you love; years of pain and anger makes you hate – the difference is clear.

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A problem with society is that it shows us false beliefs about love that we take and stick to and teaches how to fear and not how to love. The false beliefs we learn come mostly from romantic books and movies that we so devour. We all want love, yet you don’t need to acquire it as we are told to do. It is not waiting for us in Paris or in someone special. It is in you and you just need to love. Love yourself first, love your life first, love people around you and you shall see how it spreads out in a beautiful swirl of joy. Have you noticed you can’t define love? Or falling in love? We try by saying he fell in love with her eyes or she fell in love at his kind nature. Because she can dance or because he can be unexpectedly romantic. Because of this or that, but what may work for one person to feel love doesn’t mean it will work for the other. Some girls wants flowers, some girls want a leather jacket and motorcycle ride. Some guys want a romantic dinner, others want a laid back evening on a couch in sweatpants.

The point is that everybody is different yet we all want love. Love will express itself in everybody differently. You can’t define love, you can only feel it and keep it safe. And when I say keeping it safe, I mean not let your expectations stop your from simply feeling and enjoying yourself no matter of the boundaries other throw at you. Just because someone isn’t as tall as you want or doesn’t texts you “Good morning” and “Good night” or doesn’t surprise you with a cooked dinner, doesn’t mean love isn’t there. Or is younger or older or isn’t someone your friends or people around you approve. Love isn’t checking things off from the list, it just is and you can accept it and enjoy it or you can ignore it and feel frustrated and unhappy at the end of the day. Real love is easy and doesn’t put us in any stereotypical shape that we so lean towards. When we truly let go than we truly love. We don’t put expectations on ourselves or on others. No one is required to meet your expectations and you are not required to meet any of theirs.

The one who loves unconditionally is lucky and reaches the true bliss, not the one that is loved. It is love that we ourselves experience which makes us children at heart again, happy and fulfilled, seeing life with vibrant colors and beautiful sounds.

Remember, you are the one that invokes the light through your eyesight, the one who decided is it hot or cold for you, too much or not enough. The reality just is and it changes in our perception and our choice at how to perceive it. That is our free will. We are free to see the world however we chose to and we have to power to change that view anytime we want. How will you perceive the world around you depends on you what you feel and how you think.

{Music. Hozier – Take me to Church}    buuuu1

If you feel love and see new opportunities and find creative way to achieve something, life will be much more beautiful, filled with bliss and feeling content. If you feel fear and judge everything and everyone, a negative comment coming faster to your lips than does the positive one, your world will be bleaker, less magical and much more dull, almost a misery to live.

I wish you best of luck in simply loving and getting rid of any judgments our brain is programmed to bring up and to experience the life to its fullest which goes beyond just a paid job and a roof over your head.

With lots of love

Elly

You are my dream reader

{Music. Haichi }

Maybe a long time ago I wrote for someone specific, but now I find writing for myself and than… For everyone else. I want everyone to read it and find it enjoyable. If not, I wish to improve myself until they do. So, basically, my dream reader would be everyone in the world. Everyone that would need a bit of inspiration,a bit of love, a bit of laugh. This is for you.

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Dear reader,

I am gonna tell you a story about a little person which was created to explore life with everybody else.

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The little person learned from the world around it, from its people and nature surrounding it. The sounds would be recorded and the words remembered. From them it would recognize the patterns of speech that turned into stories. From stories it first learned what it later experienced. It learned to move and change. To show its emotions with movement of body and face and signal them through sound. So it grew.

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It discovered the birds in the sky, the bones in the sand and the laughter in the air. It learned the joy of drinking water on the scorching day and what it means to go with a flow of snow down the hills of mountain peaks. Seen the plants growth and felt the roughness of the tree. Touched warmth of the fire and refreshment of sea. Sang as it skipped on the river’s bank and danced around as it discovered new places and corners of the world, learning along with others around it, greeting a Sun with wide arms and joy in the eyes.

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Learned what gentle hand does to a heart and what sadness feel like. What a laugh can accomplish and a smile to someone can bright up the day. How fulfilling free love is and how joy makes you jump higher than possible. How work can be made easier with a song and it pays off to give something up to find something new. How relaxation under the tree makes a head lighter and a soul fonder. How a simple touch can skip your heart and what discovery of oneself can be.

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Time and again, life moves us all, little persons, in direction we have no knowledge where it will end or how will it progress. We can only smile, accept the change and say “Thank you for this gift of life.”

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Thank you for reading.

Love,

Elly

Blogging 101: Names and Dreams

{Music. Dillon – Thirteen Thirty-five http://youtu.be/BDsuR22GQPQ }

   I am quite content with my name. In fact, I put a lot of thought in it before I even started to search for the best blog site there is. I was between Lucy and Elly, but Elly won the prize for this one. Today came from my wish to live fully in the present, at the moment.

I have a tendency to indulge into fantasizing about the future or reminiscing on the past and what would happen if I was a bit different then, more like the one I am today – whatever that is. I long to live in a moment and sometimes I succeed, but sometimes I slip when I am left to my own devices with absolutely nothing to do. Than music starts along with thoughts.

As many may have found out already, breaking a habit is hard work. No matter how much time has passed, habits tend to find a way back in without you even noticing. It is like slumping your back and if you weren’t raised military style and have a problem like I do, you know what I am talking about. You straighten up, shoulders back, spine straight with head held high and strut away. But then, after half an hour, you find yourself slumped and bowed down, your back returning to the familiar position in which they spent so many long hours when you were in front of a computer.

The same deal is with thoughts, so is everything in life. To break away the habit completely you would have to cleanse your mind completely, go back to zero where you were once when you were a kid. Do you remember the life as a kid? Everything is fascinating, everything is new and interesting. You don’t plan ahead what you will eat or do tomorrow. You play as it struck your fancy, constantly inspired with new things and ideas and thoughts. You don’t get attached to things. Even when you are unhappy when parents pull you away from your new playground and you throw a tantrum thinking everything is terrible, as a child you will find yourself not caring few hours later, already finding a new amusement.

Yet now, all of your thoughts are 99% the same as they were a day before or even a week before. It is statistically proved that most people only get from 4 to 6 completely new ideas a year and most people never act upon them because it would mean to do something completely different. Your thoughts are the same and they start the action of your body. So if they are the same, so are your habits. If you want to change habits, you need to change your mind. Sounds impossible, right? How do you change the way your brain works? How do you clean it from all the unnecessary crap that resides there and constantly makes itself known, not helping you in the slightest? Some start with training their body and as it changes so does their mind. Some completely change their social circles, meeting new people and starting blank. You shall find that if you are a lot around unhappy people, you get pulled down, as well. Same goes if surround yourself with positive or succesful people. And some, like me, meditate or do something in that style. You basically slowly clean yourself from all the stress and worries that you collected in yourself for years and that you collect daily. It helped me greatly in this past five years that I am practising meditation. I would not be a person I am today without it. It helped me let go of many things and thoughts and as such, create space in where I could learn things to improve myself mentally and emotionally, and even physically.

However, it is a process and still my thoughts wander off to either past or future which they have no business doing. Thinking about the future means nothing if you aren’t working in the present moment on making it happen. Blogging is also a way to improve my writing with your help so that some dreams don’t stay dreams.

Dreams – I found lately that I felt most content when I made others happy and make them laugh. When I showed them care and love (which I believe, if it was expressed more freely people wouldn’t feel so unhappy all the time) instead of a stony face, even some of the closed up people opened up easily enough. It is a joy to see it and experience it. So, happiness and love. Spread that shit everywhere.

Beauty… I love beauty, I see it everywhere I turn. In pale eyes of an old homeless guy, in a shine and flutter of bird’s wing soaring through a sky, in a belly hurting laughter and joyful face, in beautiful, happy people and talents expressed. Do not be surprised if a post or two springs up dedicated to a beauty of some talented person that I find enchanting. Speaking of talents {Music video. JustSomeMotion  Caravan Palce – Brotherswing}

I love how free people can be and sad that so people don’t let themselves be free in their speak, movement and beliefs because of the harsh society and fear of mockery they might experience from their peers when they show their uniqueness and difference. You don’t even know how many talents you have and what you can be and you don’t even let yourself explore it and show. Great artists and people didn’t become great because they blended in the crowd. We all want to be great and famous yet around others we try to be the same as them. A bit of contradictory, isn’t it? Be free for you only have one life to be that.

And last, art. Gosh, where do I even start? I was raised walking the theater halls and Vienna opera houses along with concerts and sounds of piano while meeting people recognized in their field. And I see art everywhere – in the seemingly chaotic nature around us, in bright colors of the sky as the Sun touches the edge of Earth, in changing layers of oceans, in people and their movement, in the way that we are all so different yet exactly the same, in a gradual flow of time that transforms a gangly teenager in a graceful person full of life and later wisdom earned through life, in the frequencies of music as it makes you move, in cities filled with new and old structures, decorated with lights alight at night looking like a most beautiful Christmas tree, in dancing flames and colorful fabric that moves through air.

Art isn’t just a well-connected mix of colors on canvas or a symphony of tones and foot movement. It is everywhere around you and when you realize that, you learn to see it. And, here is the greatest secret many have forgotten – you, yourself is pure art and unique in your existence. So take care that your life is as best as it can be for it is your work of art and what you leave to others.

Another thing that I am missing, but shall have to add to my tagline is inspiration for I want to inspire people and have them inspire me in return. This is where magic is made.

Peace and love,

Elly